Am I really important?

On April 20th, 2011, I saw “Criminal Minds Suspect Behavior”; in the episode there was a black & white girl kidnapped. What hurts the most…is that the white girl was getting a lot of media…cause she came from the suburbs…the black girl, who came from the “ghetto” was getting no media…they searched for her 9 days ago and that’s it…

Now some can argue that because of the color of her skin; the black girl received no attention…I am not here to argue about her color…I am here to argue about her status…In one hand you have the “have”…in another hand you have “the have not”. A lot of us come from the “have not” category; we work our “ass” out day in and day out…everything we have we worked hard for…I am not saying that the “have” never worked hard; some did and some got everything handed to…which is okay…if we were treated equal.

In the Declaration of Independence it states, “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator…”, read more. So why do we have two categories that we go into? Why do office men/women, politicians, society and so on distinguish between the rich and poor? Is not about your color (even though it plays a big role)…it’s about having money or not…If you look at O.J. Simpson’s first trial…everyone knew he was guilty…but because he had money and was able to afford the late Johnnie Cochran he was acquitted…

Now I am not mad at a person…if they had nothing and now has everything…I am mad when the person believes that because he/she has everything that they are untouchable. I believe that we all have a goal in mind…to work hard for a piece of that “American Dream”… Now, why is it that because I don’t have all the money…I can’t be treated equal? Am I really important?

Do I have to be rich for someone to care about me, about what I say, or about what I do…Does money really talks? I am not that old…but I still can recall that society distinguish between the “have” and “have not”when is this going to stop? When will all men / women no matter how much money they have, no matter what color they are, no matter what is their status, no matter what…they will be treated equal…

I ask again…Am I really important?


Part II: Before My Second Stroke

I have been asking myself, “What would I say”… I mean, I just suffered a stroke two months ago…how was I before this major change in my life? I can tell you with certainty that the friends that I had before the stroke…I have them no more. Part of that is because of the interview I did…the other part…well I guess they were not friends to start with. Why is it that you have a lot of friends when you have everything? However in your darkest moment…everyone (sometimes) your inner family disappears. In my case, everyone except my wife & kids left…

My business was booming after the stroke…I had everything planned, except if the owner suffered a “stroke”… I implore that if you own a small-business…have a Plan A, B, & C…may seem like a lot, trust me it will save your “ass” later…Now my wife not knowing a lot about the business…is running it. Just want to say, “that the business is still booming, even with the stroke”…we have a couple of hiccups to take care of…however the business continues to grow each month. Check it out at

Me and the family have always been distant…when they need me I am there…when I need them they are there. Me and my parents have been trying to work out our differences…It is tough…however, like a goal…if you maintain yourself determine and willing…you can accomplish it. I don’t see eye to eye on many things my family believe in…but that’s what makes us “unique”…if everyone is the same, this world would be boring. Like I mentioned before, “family” is what makes you…no one is blessed with the “perfect” family…no matter what you still “love” them because they are your family.

My favorite actor says, “Acting is just a way of making a living; the family is life.”Denzel Washington

One thing that has not changed is that I am still an “asshole”…meaning, I said it like it is. Some people don’t like that…some even talked behind my back…however, I will continue speaking the truth no matter what…because like it’s said, “Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” –John 8:32… If you want to hear the truth…I will give it…if you don’t want to hear it…I will still give it…that my friends is what makes me an “asshole”… however I rather tell you the truth and not lie. Cause how can we have men/women fight for our freedoms….and yet, we can’t hurt no one with the truth… Tell me do you want me to tell you the truth or not?

This is what I remember before I had my second stroke…is not that much…however, it’s good with what I went through…which I will share…

PART III: MY SECOND STROKE will be on Tuesday, June 7, 2011…DON’T MISS IT!!!

Why did I get married…

I have seen both Tyler Perry’s movies, “Why Did I  Get Married“… After both movies I asked myself why did I get married? I love my wife unconditionally…but why did I chose to spend the rest of my life with her?

My single friends tell me I committed a mistake…My response to them…is simple…“I don’t wake up alone…I don’t go through obstacles alone…I don’t cry, get mad, suffer, be happy alone”

I know being single is good…do whatever you want without no one telling you nothing…how long can that last? How long can a man / woman go before they need someone?

My married friends tell me it’s love; what does “love” really mean…The meaning of love based on someone else, click here…but what does “love” mean to you? What does caring about an individual really means? How do you really know you love a person?

I love my wife and kids…however, how do they really know? What have I done lately to show them that “I love them”?

When my mother said that I was a mistake…I hated every women. Meaning, the one person that I love the most  abandoned me & broke my heart…besides all the great women that came into my life, the one woman who taught me how to truly love again was my wife. She showed me that no matter what a person has, no matter what a person looks like, no matter what a person can give…if you care about them, if you love them, if that person is your soul mate…you forget about their weaknesses, their iniquities, their mistakes, their issues…and you love them no matter what…is that my friends the true meaning of love? If it’s not…then what is the true meaning?

If it wasn’t for me to reunite with the woman of my dreams nine years ago…I honestly can tell you, “I don’t know where I would be”. I have been married for 8 years…there has been “good times” & “bad times”…any relationship is not easy; if it was everyone would do it…however I can tell you that no matter how much of a headache my wife is and I am…I will never let her go…cause no matter what…I truly love my wife and kids…and that my friends is “Why I got married…”

How long have you been married?

Part I: My First Stroke…

As I mentioned before I have had two strokes…I will give you an insight from my own eyes the before/after of my two strokes.

I have decided to break my story into four parts; which are:
Part I: My First Stroke
Part II: Before My Second Stroke
Part III: My Second Stroke
Part IV: Recovery

So let’s get started…

It was a hot summer Friday, on July 2003; when I had to go to work to finish off the week. I woke up like any other day, jumped in the shower, got dressed, ate and left to work. Around lunch time I decided to walk to the store…so I went bought some stuff and came back…started to eat my lunch, and then it started…

The first and last thing I heard was a loud noise…

Then I lost all my five senses: sight, hearing, feeling, tasting, smelling…I knew what was going on around me…however I couldn’t do anything…that is the worst feeling. My co-worker called 911; they showed up pretty quick for being in Rochester, NY…I love my service men / women…however they take a little more time to show up depending on what neighborhood you are from…I was on the West Side…if you are from the “ROC” you know what I am talking about…I knew the ambulance guys or women where there…cause they where holding me. I couldn’t see or talk to them…but I could hear them…I guess my hearing and feeling came back. I wanted to tell them that I was feeling very horrible…but I couldn’t…all I did was throw up. If you never had a stroke…first don’t have one, secondly you can learn the signs by going to:

The ambulance took me to the hospital…and I guess my co-worker called my wife. After everything that happened my wife confesses that she went to my job by bus, grabbed my car, then went to the hospital…now why I tell you this? Cause my car was standard and the wife didn’t know how to drive standard. She was telling me how every 5 seconds the car would stall…however she managed to make it to the hospital. It was funny then and funny now…my wife always found a way to make any obstacle a laughing one…which is good. Sometimes, we start focusing on the obstacle and have no solution…the best medicine is laughter…cause we forget for a brief moment about our obstacle…at that moment we have a clear mind, which allows us to think and figure out a solution to the obstacle…“God I love my wife for her brilliance!”

In the hospital, they did so many exams…even the one, where they stick a “huge” needle in your spinal cord…the doctor’s call it a spinal tap, I call it, “that s#%* hurts”. The doctor’s told my wife that I had suffered a stroke…but they never told her what kind of stroke I had. Several hours later I regain all my senses…except feeling to my left hand. It took about 4-5 months for me to gain some feeling in my left hand…it was still somewhat weak…however I managed.

I went home that same night with no therapy…and still feeling like “crap”. I had to take some time “off” of work to recover..and boy was I going insane…so insane that I built a beautiful garden in my old apartment (I went back several years later to see if the garden was there..nope, it was destroyed.) I even fixed my apartment…cause unfortunately we had a slum-lord…which is very common in Rochester, NY. I don’t understand how you can own several houses / apartments and don’t take care of them..but, take care of yours. How does that make sense?

It took awhile…but I was back to work. My first stroke wasn’t as bad as my second one. My therapist for my second stroke told me & my wife that my first stroke was in the right side of my brain…didn’t cause that much damage. The second stroke was in the “Cerebellum”; which messed up with my co-ordination, balance, strength, and speech. I will speak more about it on Part III.

The first stroke wasn’t bad…however it was still a stroke…and I survived. Unless you had a stroke you would never understand what that person is going through…I hope you learned something from my story…luv ya

PART II: BEFORE MY SECOND STROKE will be on Tuesday, April 26, 2011…DON’T MISS IT!!!

I have a dream to be…

This weekend I saw, ” The Hurricane” with Denzel Washington…based on true events. Whether is true or not I enjoyed the movie; at the same time it taught me something…“that no matter what color you are, if you have a dream and follow it…you will accomplish that dream…” The Hurricane had a dream that one day justice will be given; Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr, had a dream that one day blacks & whites will be together hand in hand…if you want to hear Rev. Martin Luther king, Jr’s speech, here it is:…we have come a very long way from the times of slavery,  and segregation. However, we still have a long way ahead of us…I loved when we nominated our first black president (Barack H. Obama); whether you believe in his politics or not…when are we going to nominate our first Latino president? When are we going to nominate our first woman? Hillary Clinton had that dream…to be the first woman president, but didn’t accomplish it…I love Hillary, but come on how many women you let down…but that’s “okay” cause we will have our first woman and Latino president.

My dream is to inspired young Latino brothers and sisters, “that they can accomplish anything if they set their mind to it”…they just have to believe in that dream. When I was watching T.V. this weekend, I saw a lot of Latino brothers & sisters…some with their own shows and others with big roles. Most of them started in worse situations than us; but they never let their dream down…and now they are big celebrities. Us Latinos have inspired music, T.V., and much more…look at all the Latino celebrities.

Now is time to forget about our excuses…and live our dream. Cause “what if” tomorrow never comes. I have and will continue living my dream, no matter what happens…I remember telling my wife about two weeks after the doctor’s discharged me from the hospital, “Honey, open-heart surgeries, strokes, society, teachers, my own mother and father tried taking me down…but they couldn’t accomplish the task at hand…I guess the only thing that will take me down is death itself…” I can tell you that if I did it you can do it…but in reality are you ready to tell people no matter who it is to move out of your way…are you ready to fulfill your dream in this world…are you ready to be laughed at, called a liar, racist and much more…are you ready? Or, when will you be?

My professor once said, “You have hope, until you give your last breath”…then he said, “but…don’t wait until your last breath…do it now, cause you never know if tomorrow will come…” I didn’t know I was going to suffer a second stroke…it came by surprise…just like the stroke came by surprise so can death…so I implore you…don’t wait until the last-minute…

Tomorrow I talk about my two strokes….

Hasta Manana,

What I Really Think About You?

I can’t mention your name because of legal issues…but I can say that you are from “Lodi, NY” and you are not Latina…Since, I met you back about two years ago…you showed me what a real woman is. I thought before I met you, that a woman was not equal to a man…but boy, was I wrong.

Woman not only bear children…but they do more than a man…seriously men listen…a woman can do what you can do and much more…I have one question to every man out there; can you go through PMS or can you give birth to a child?

What makes you different…simple…is the love you display to your family and everyone else…but yet, you are stronger than the wind…they stated that you should be “Mother Theresa…” and yes they are right. Actually, as wonderful as Mother Theresa is you are better. I remembered one day that you displayed your love towards me, when I was feeling down…and you barely knew me. We need more people like you in this world…unfortunately there are only a couple.

When I gave my interview you laughed with others and believed that it was a lie…although everything I said was true…and when I said “Americanos” I didn’t mean you or your family…so this is a public apology to you and your family…and to let you know that you truly inspired me, no matter who says different…I will always love the way you spoke and taught me…for that I am always grateful. I will always love you and your family, no matter what you think about me.

If this is my 5 minutes of fame…than I want to spend them saying “Thank You” for everything you, your husband and your family has done…for me and my family.

Your family are blessed to have you, your friends should be honored, and those who met you are touched…Thank You and this is how I really feel about you…no matter who says otherwise…

Who Am I Really??

When I took a moment to think about this question…I had to pace for a while and then realize that “I am a blessing under disguise…” It sounds conceded, but give me a second to explain. In your life when you are in your darkest moment…someone who ever it is…comes to your rescue…I have done that for a lot of people, and sometimes I forget about myself.

In Hebrew, my name Jonathan means, “gift of God” ( What a wonderful meaning, but at the same time it bears a lot of responsibility. I tell you right now, I am 29 years old and happily married…but I have lied, argued, fought, been and still am proud, and done stuff I regret–in other words I am no Angel.

Like many of us that have done naughty things…so I am not here to judge…I am just here to speak my mind and help my Latino brothers and sisters in any way possible. I love all my races…however we all pick a group, and I pick my Latino brothers and sisters…who have brilliance but don’t let it shine. You know one voice can change the world…

I have been called Dr. Martin Luther King for the Latinos, Jesus, The Preacher, and much more…I am honored, however I am not them…I am Jonathan Baez the small Latino with a big voice…loved by few, hated by many.

Quickly, I have gone through two open-heart surgeries with pacemakers, going to get my third pacemaker soon, told by my mother that I was a mistake should have never been born, my dad reject me, my brother tried to kill me, had guns in my head, knifes in my throat, did drugs, hustled, lived in the street, preached, got married young, graduated at 11th grade with all my credits, was told by my Math Teacher that I won’t graduate because I am a “spic”, love to debate, had a stroke at 21, then another at 28, was called a liar, racist and Frank Abagnale…but no matter what went wrong, I never did or will give up…because, “Success is not for the faint of heart…” (Author Unknown)

This is me…love me, hate me…however, I will never change… A Latino with a voice…living, speaking, and changing lives…this is Who I Really Am…